my sickies...

I have been out of touch with the world, I feel b/c all 3 of my children have been sick (my husband as well, and he never really gets sick). There was the flu and a type of a cold, which is lingering.

I have had strong feelings towards vomit for as long as I can remember. I am afraid of it...yes, I know that I have many fears, as I have just described another one of them in a recent blog. My feelings towards vomit are similar to the feeling of having found mice droppings in my home (we have been mouse free for about 6 months!!) That feeling of a black cloud lingering over your home, that disease has infiltrated every nook and cranny, that the very air you breathe is filled with millions of germs. Mice are 100 times worse than vomit, but it starts out the same for me, with that same feeling in the pit of your gut...that, can it get any worse? Is my home going to be overrun by mice (or vomit)? Is my home going to be covered in vomit FOREVER??

You hear your child start to cough, you run to them with the "spit up" bowl, they start hacking, you reach for a towel, then it comes...all of the grapes or dry toast you fed them...it comes in slightly chewed chunks in full force. Do they get it into the bowl or toilet? Sometimes, sometimes not...sometimes they get it on your floor, or on your hair, or on your face (initiating your gag reflex). Sometimes they throw up while they are sound asleep and it gets on their hair, face and all over their freshly washed beds.

During these periods of sickness, I cannot rest my mind...I am forever ready with the bowl, I am constantly doing laundry and I am bleaching everything that I am allowed too. I jump, ready, at the slightest moan or cough. I am constantly asking how their tummies are feeling. It becomes tiring. And just when you think, you will never leave the house again, or that you cannot handle another chunky bed sheet, the clouds part and the sun comes thru. They are on the mend...

Well, in the grand scheme of life, I realize that these matters are purely momentary and trivial. I have overcome MOST of my fears of the dreaded vomit otherwise known as emetophobia (this is an actual phobia) having dealt with it now on several occasions with myself and 3 small children.

Now, the fear of mice....that's another story.

(audrey is wearing her dance leotard)