Saturday, July 25, 2009

my memories of dad

Death notice in Tri-City Herald, ran 6/26/09:
Robert M. Blodgett
Robert Michael Blodgett, 58, of Kennewick, died June 24 in Richland.
He was born in Helena, Mont., and lived in the Tri-Cities for 13 years.
He was a chief financial officer in the software industry.
Mueller's Tri-Cities Funeral Home, Kennewick, is in charge of arrangements.

(Tri-City Herald obituary ran 6/27/09):
ROBERT MICHAEL BLODGETT
Mueller's Tri-Cities Funeral Home It is with great sorrow that we announce the passing of Robert Michael Blodgett. Robert was born in Helena, Montana on November 26, 1950. He was proud of his Bitterroot Valley heritage throughout his life. Robert excelled in athletics, serving as captain of the Kennewick High School football and basketball teams. He attended Ricks College on a basketball scholarship. Thereafter, he graduated with a degree in Accounting from Brigham Young University. A few of his professional accomplishments include certifying as a CPA and starting a successful Tri-Cities-based tax and accounting firm, working as the Vice President of Finance for an international shipping company, and most recently serving as the Chief Financial Officer for Vivid Learning Systems. Robert loved the Lord and was devoted to His church. He served two years as a missionary in Germany for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Throughout his life, he held many positions of responsibility in his congregations, most recently as a counselor in the bishopric of the Rancho Reata ward. Most importantly, Robert was an example and leader to his family, which he loved and to whom he was completely dedicated. Surviving family members include his wife Debra Boyer, who he married for time and eternity in the Oakland California Temple on December 29, 1973; children Jennifer Lyn Ahrens, Janelle Lee Huff, Michael Robert Blodgett, Ryan Boyer Blodgett, Jonathan William Blodgett, Amy Rebecca Cook and Evan Christopher Blodgett; mother Hazel Evans Blodgett; siblings Dennis Clinton Blodgett, Thomas William Blodgett and Julie Kay Mickelson; and seven grandchildren. He was predeceased by his father Robert William Blodgett. A public viewing will be held at Mueller's Tri-Cities Funeral Home, 1401 S. Union St., Kennewick, WA on Sunday, June 28, 2009, from 5:00 p.m. to 7:00 p.m. Funeral services will be held at the LDS Chapel at 895 W. Gage Blvd. Richland, WA on Monday, June 29, 2009 at 10:00 a.m. The family invites you to sign their online guestbook at www. muellersfuneralhomes.com.

My wonderful, intelligent, & hilarious father died suddenly of a heart attach on June 24th 2009. He was found by my brother Michael on the floor in our house by the garage door. He called 911 and the operator preceded to give my mentally ill brother directions on how to perform CPR on my dad. The ambulance came and rushed him to Kadlec Medical Center where he was pronounced dead after 45 min. My grandmother, Hazel, (my father's mother) called my mom on her cell phone to inform us of his death. We were camping at Nehalem Bay, OR for a few days prior to a planned Boyer reunion. My mother became hysterical and immediately was in disbelief. She asked Grandma to tell Tom and Brent to go to the hospital and give dad a blessing to bring him back to life. We all immediately rushed back to Kennewick, it took about 7 hours and it has been a slight blur since then. All of our family, extended family, cousins, aunts, uncles, in-laws etc. came to the viewing and funeral which was so wonderful and nice. Having so much family around and having so many relatives to offer comfort and want to help was the most comforting thing. My mom was devastated and zombie like. My brothers Ryan and Jon stepped up to the responsibility and were so comforting to all of us and very excellent examples of compassion, kindness, responsibility and spirituality. They were pretty amazing. Jen and Amy were wonderful as well. We all banded together to support one another and it was the most comforting to be around and with my brothers and sisters.
My father's death is such a stinging blow to me. When we first arrived back all i wanted to do was see him and be able to hug him. When we were finally able to see his dead body at the funeral home, I saw the workers wheeling him into the makeup room. His lips were blue and he looked the same, just asleep. That image will always make me feel sad. Those were the hardest times, to see his dead cold body and realize that his spirit is gone, but seeing him and wanting him to awaken and come home with us.
He was such a strong, stalwart man. My father was possibly the only other person on this earth that could bring me to the brink of realization. He had the ability to put my small stupid trials, cares or concerns into the proper perspective. He would always say to me with a crooked smile..."life is hopeless..."He of course was kidding b/c he knew that I was weighted down with silly things and he knew that I should snap out of it. And oddly, my dad, could always help me to do just that. I felt like he understood my deep sorrow and sadness in life's hurtful world. He knew I would feel the weight of things and he thru my admiration of him, or my respect at his intelligence, or thru my love of him as my father could always make me feel good about myself and about life. Now that he is gone, I fear that my relief at life's disturbing sadness will never leave me. I will not "get over it". Now there is only heaviness, burden and trial. There is no crooked smile at the end of a deep thoughtful conversation. Of which I had many with my father whom I respected and believed to be able to cure me of my ills. I am 32 weeks pregnant, I have just lost my beloved father and am having a hard time dealing with life at this point. I am so bogged down by my sadness. It has been so helpful to have my sister and brother here for most of the summer. I am scared for when they leave and I will be here alone to deal with my sad widowed mother, finances, bi-polar brother, my own family and family issues, my own mental health. Life is too sad. I cannot seem to discover how to have a happy existence. Is this possible? Why are we here to constantly struggle to find peace or joy? Why are those moments so fleeting? I have had nothing in my life that has maintained a feeling of satisfaction or joy in my life. Yes, I realize I have a good life in comparison to some. A home, food, healthy children (for now), but I cannot look back and say I have enjoyed my life or that I am happy.
We were able to spend father's day with him on the Sunday prior to his death. That was nice, I wish I could remember our conversations. we had Chinese chicken w/o bacon in the rice. I hugged him and told him I loved him.

Memories of my dad (to be added to as days come and go):
Playing prisoner for 30 min.
Him telling the boys to attack me and my friends with pillows.
Him teasing me and my young friends about boys.
Him being so angry with me for quitting basketball in NJ, but sending me flowers the next day. He was quick to anger, but quick to forgive and ask forgiveness.
Our trip to MT to see Amy run. So fun and funny to see my dad walking around the course as quick as he could to see Amy at different times in her race, binoculars in hand. Him holding up his pants with his hand and having suspenders on. His insane driving: driving while he has to go to the bathroom and bursting & talking or yelling b/c he could barely hold it in. Him insisting that he is NOT sleepy when in fact he would bob his head and swerve off the road. Me in literal fear of an accident while driving with him.
Him calling me late at night to tell me that he and Tom were driving around Kennewick with the top down, cruising for babes listening to wild thing.
Him calling me and leaving a slightly angry message about where my kids "hid" the remote control.
Dad saying that he will have to be the instigator at the reunion b/c Jon wasn't going to be there.
Dad sitting on the lawn in the cool grass enjoying the beautiful weather.
Our arguments over American Idol contestants.

What were our last conversations? I have already forgotten.

1 comment:

D-dawg said...

My dad also has called to ask where Macey "hid" something of his.

Oh I wish I had something good to say to this post. Life really is pretty crappy sometimes and I wish it wasn't. SOmetimes I'm ready to be done with it! Missing your dad must hurt so much- I can't even imagine. I'm so sorry. I love reading memories of him so keep posting those. Those will be so great to look back on and share with your kids.